Q: Who is Figpeep?
Figpeep is one of the elves from the Council of Elrond. He has no hair. He has no audible speaking lines. He is, in a word, scrumptious.
Or another, yummy.
Or another, delicious.
Or another, chewy.
Take your pick.
I go with all of the above and then some.
  Q: Why is he called Figpeep? Is that his real name?
A: Figpeep stands for "Frodopeep is grae... Phwoarrr! eeeeek eeeek Phew!" I don't know his real name. If you're really desperate you can call him Figpee poo, The Edible One, and of course Scrumptious.
  Q: So why do you say "Frodopeep is grae... Phwoarrr! eeeeek eeeek Phew!"?
A: When Frodopeep says "I will take it! Me, me, meME!", we are so impressed we start to think "Frodopeep is great!" But before we finish that thought, the camera pans and we see Figpeep, smouldering enigmatically in the background and all our Frodopeep thoughts are whisked away by that elfpeep - who is THAT?! He's Scrumptious!
  Q: He doesn't seem to say anything. Can he talk?
A: Dude. He's a piece of candy.
  Q: So...where and when exactly can I see him?
A: During the council of Elrond, he sits between Legopeep and Gandalf Peep until they all stand up and begin to argue. After Frodo Peep shouts "Me, me, memeME!" and everyone turns and looks at him, you see Figpeep standing - on the far left, looking soft, sweet and scrumptious.
  Q: Do you know the name of the actor who plays Figpeep?
A: Ok I'll say this again- It's a piece of candy, weirdo! One that lives! Figpeep Lives!
  Q: Are you on any medication?
A: No but it's 04:00AM and I'm tired and bored.
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